As long as you follow
by Malice Shaw
Summary: Aftermath: A song fic involving Seifer, afterwards of the game. Ripe full of Quiefer yumminess to tickle your senses with joy. Read and Review!


As Long As You Follow  
********************* 

_I've been searching_  
_For a pot of gold_  
_Like the kind you find_  
_At the end of the rainbow_

Look in the mirror boy. Yeah, I'm calling myself a boy because I sure as hell ain't a man. A man doesn't do what I did. A man sure as hell doesn't do to her what I did to her. He shows her the way he feels by taking her hand in public, our giving her his jacket when it rains, or even sitting down next to her listening to everything that's weighing down those beautifully sculpted shoulders. You most certainly don't try to kill her, for Hyne's sake and sure as fuck don't do to her what I did to her. I wanted to love someone. Be someone. Have someone. Everything. I wanted everything. She was the only one who could fit those catagories perfectly. I could have had her any split moment I wanted. I did have her, actually. Then, what did I do?

I lost her. 

Because I was stupid. My pot of gold at the end of my rainbow ended up being tarnished, leaving me green with guilt. Falling from the skies into the ocean below, I cursed the waters that engulfed me. The cool, icy liquid heightened my senses and numbed me at the same time. Gasping out saltwater, I dragged my weary body to the sand and relished the fact I was still alive. Then I went fishing.

_I've been dreaming_  
_Thought it was in vain_  
_Ah, but now you're here_  
_Can't believe that you're back again_

The fish always refused to bite. They caught onto Raijin's like like nothing else, but for me? No, never. At least I had Fujin by my side to toss his ass into the waters. Always brought a smile to my face, that woman would. I miss them already. After a few weeks of being nomads, I waved my hand in the air and demanded that they go home. Back to Garden. They weren't me, and there was no way I was going to let them fall from grace with me. At first they protested, telling me they were my posse. No way in hell was I gonna listen to this posse bullshit any longer. I was a lone man, alone. Even when they begged me to come back with them, I had to refuse. I mean, come on? Why would they want me back? Why would she?

_Now I know I can't lose_  
_As long as you follow_  
_I'm gonna win_ _I'm gonna beg, steal, or borrow_  
_As long as you follow_

If I stay here I'm gonna lose more then I ever could bargain for. No one wants a sorceress' lap dog for a friend. It's lonely, to say the least. With out my friends here, fishing can be lonely. I keep expecting to see Fujin and Raijin behind me, shouting their catchs and pushing eachother into the water. I can't win this battle anymore then I could have tried to take over the world as the lapdog I was. 

As I tap my pole into the water, my mind starts to wander just a bit. The Garden flies high above my head. It seems like it's gonna dock here now. I don't want that. It's been weeks since Fuu and Rai left. I can't let them see me like this, not the way they left me. I planned on being someone different, having a decent job, then doing this crap still. Right now they'd be SeeDs, if they didn't have to make up the credits they lost when I took them down hill with me. That Garden, I can't believe how it still takes my breath away. I wonder still, how she's doing. Does she have a boyfriend? Is she and Squall dating? Is she still that same strict Instructor I called mediocre? I'm still licking myself ever since she lost her license for that, and my damned list. I wish I never even mentioned her name in the same sentense as 'The List' now. She wasn't mediocre. I was. 

A shadow covering my own snaps me from my own judgement. Snapping into position, I reached for Hyperion until a soft soled leather boot stomps down onto it. Gazing upwards, I found myself whispering her name before I could even distinguish my reality from my fantasy that it was infact her. Lifting a boot from my blade, she sat down gently next to me, and with out saying a word unlaced her boots and let her pretty toes trail into the water. 

_I've been wandering_  
_Gone away too far_  
_But the road was rough_  
_To get back where you are_

She says something that my ears can't hear. All I can see is her. The crashing waves grow lower and lower until they imbed in silence, and a ringing in my head signals that I've just dropped from my day dreaming again. Our conversation is short. Just her simply asking me how I was, what I was doing, and I answering in short as hell words. Should have talked longer, whispered more so she could tilt that pretty head towards me a little more so I can catch a whiff of her scent. In this position, it felt more intimate than anything I ever felt before in my life, her just giving me the eye with those sapphires and I blowing out my problems and feelings, asking a few questions of my own. 

When I spoke of Raijin and Fujin, she nodded her foxen chin and looked outwards to the horizon, telling me that my assumptions were right. They did make SeeD after all, but missed me terribly. I don't see how they could. I took them with me on my flight to hell and back, and then sent them on their merry way back to the place that we nearly destroyed. They were friends, and I thought that was the best thing I could do for them. I've been on the road to ruin for so long, and it's a tough one. They didn't need to. And they never should. 

_And the sun went down_  
_It never seemed to rise_  
_Ah, but now you're here_  
_With the light shining in your eyes_

Can't believe how long we talked. For almost hours, it seems. Felt like mere minutes. When she stood up and brushed her skirts off and pulled her boots on, and laced them up with out missing a beat in her talk. Blinking back surprise, I checked my watch and cursed, noting the time. I stood up next to her and tilted my head at her, catching one last glimpse at her to memorize each strand that fell on her face, and how bronzed her skin looked in the dusky evening. I was surprised she wasn't with anyone yet, or for that matter, not planning on it. A dark thought creeped into my mind that maybe I could change that notion. But it quickly escaped and I shook my head a little, and continued to just stare at those shining, gleaming pools of blue that entrapped me.

Almost too quickly she gives me a good bye, and turns on her heel, walking down the wooden planks, hugged her body with her slim arms, and I cringe, whispering to myself, Please.. turn around.

_Now I know I can't lose_  
_As long as you follow_  
_I'm gonna win_  
_I'm gonna beg, steal, or borrow_

She seemed to read my mind. Stopping suddenly on the dock, she twisted her body to me, and gave me one last look with those beautiful eyes and whsipered my name. 

"Seifer.." 

I looked at her, and I felt something tug in my chest. "Quistis?" 

She held out her hand to me, and took a few steps closer. I didn't feel myself lifting my own hand to engulf it, since I could never tear myself away from her eyes. Those beautiful, big, soulful eyes. Them, along with the rest of her was completely beautiful. Beautiful. 

My fingers laced into hers, and I eased her closer to me. Taking careful steps, once again she tilted that beatiful face to me and smiled. 

"Come home." Was all she would have to say. I'd understand it in any language. Come home. Home... 

To Raijin, and Fujin, to the Garden... 

To everyone who hated me. 

I voiced these concerns to her, and she shook her head flagrantly, letting her gorgeous hair wrap slightly around her neck and trail her collar bone. Without realizing it I eased it away, and admired the way she looked to me. Like an ethereal creature, a goddess.. 

A queen. 

_Yes, I can live today_  
_If you give me tomorrow_  


With a smile and a word of encouragement, her arms came around my neck and her kiss, as soft as petals, touched mine. Electricity sparked between us, and I could only relish the touch as one would recieve a kiss from a lont love who's feelings for you never died. Except this time it was me who was feeling it, and feeling it bad. Falling wouldn't be a good term for it, but diving into it would fit the bill a bit more. 

Her lips parted from mine, and I could feel her scarse breath on my chin, and I knew she could feel mine. Again, she asked me to come with her, rejoin the clan at Balamb, and I could only say the one thing that seemed to fit the bill perfectly at that moment. 

"As long as you follow.._As long as you follow_

********************************************   
"As long as you follow" By Fleetwood Mac 


End file.
